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Is there a 'menaissance' revolution on the way?

April 16th, 2010
03:41 PM ET

For all the women out there, I think it’s time for you to finally answer the question of whether you like your men to be the rugged masculine type or if you prefer a bit more sensitivity in a metrosexual kind of way.

Manly vs metrosexual- what's better?

Manly vs metrosexual- what's better?

The metrosexual revolution firmly took its grip on male culture after football player David Beckham infamously wore a sarong in public and kicked off the debate in the 1990s.

In turn, nearly two decades later millions of men have become accustomed to their face moisturizer and herbal scurbs in addition to tight jeans and sometimes even tighter shirts.

In many cases, your typical manly man has disappeared among a generation of younger men.

But could there be a "menaissance" revolution on our heels?

Well, if a small group of university professors in the United States have their way, there soon will be a new academic discipline called male studies.

“Males are at a point now where they are experiencing a considerable amount of dismay and uncertainty and males have somewhat been scorned, in principle by females,” Lionel Tiger told CNN.

Tiger goes on to say that the idea behind a male studies course is to explore the biology behind masculinity and that it was in part created out of a concern that our culture was “feminizing boys”.

While you may or may not agree with the theory of feminization, other men are fighting the problem by going retro.

Brett McCay supports the “retrosexual movement” and has written “The Art of Manliness” which he says men can end the confusion by embracing the tradition of machismo that includes honor and self-reliance.

Here’s your chance to sound off on this issue.

Do you think men are ready to ditch the metrosexual movement and embrace a more ‘manly’ way of life? Is there even a problem in the first place?

Please leave your comments below and let us know where you’re writing from.

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Filed under:  General
soundoff (84 Responses)
  1. Christine

    Both

    April 16, 2010 at 3:45 pm | Reply
  2. Neil

    I wish I could take this class. If I have to look at one more pair of skinny jeans, I'm gonna lose it.

    The world needs a new John Wayne!

    April 16, 2010 at 5:06 pm | Reply
  3. Bill Stapp

    Women do not get to dictate how men should be... unless women allow men to dictate how they should be.

    April 16, 2010 at 5:07 pm | Reply
  4. Sheiligh

    So whats 'manliness'? While some things are beyond
    gender, eg., survival, sex, reproduction, how we do things
    differs. As a warrior feminist from way back, who in those
    days thought men were not important to children, were
    nothing but trouble and bias, were expendable, I have
    learned I was wrong.
    Men are different from women, let no feminist or anyone
    else tell you differently. Perhaps only men can say how, tho.
    Its easy being a woman. Youre desires and abilities, re:
    reproduction are clear and unchangeable. You can give
    birth, men cant. The differences between us, I think, really
    stem from that reproductive difference. Everything else
    seems to be about the same. They say women are more
    gentle, merciful, compassionate than men. Dont believe them.
    Women have merely learned to keep their mouths shut and
    be nice because in caveman times, or in Islamic circles
    women are still getting raped, murdered, stoned to death
    for all kinds of male produced delusions and grievance.
    So. Women learned to pretend to be nice. We are not so nice.
    Some men are more compassionate, trusting, courageous
    and honorable than many women and these men are not
    compromised by any feminization, they just are good people.
    Women are more compromised because of our history of
    being oppressed, so its harder to know what women are
    really like in a fair world. I suggest we are not much nicer
    or less warlike or less revengeful or less aggressive than
    your average guy. I think men need to be left alone to discover
    who and how they are. Then we should listen to what they
    say and stop imposing theories on them.
    Women, listen up.

    April 16, 2010 at 5:08 pm | Reply
  5. Brock Miles

    Metrosexuality is an invention of cosmetics type companies desperate to sell men what they sell women – skin care, body wash, etc etc etc. The media , desperate for advertising dollars support the issue. Younger men, conditioned by a hypermedia world may succomb – sadly.

    April 16, 2010 at 5:09 pm | Reply
  6. M

    It's about damn time. Men have become a lost cause. You cannot find the integrity, sacrafice and intelligence like that of our Founding Fathers?~ Good luck and get started.

    April 16, 2010 at 5:14 pm | Reply
  7. Carly

    I love men that take care of themselves from head to toe, but there is a point of over doing it. Using moisturizers and getting a pedicure once in a while for a man is one thing, but its totally another when you are getting your eyelashes tinted and going to extremes even more than women. We are not in the caveman days and there is nothing wrong for a guy to want look and feel his best.

    April 16, 2010 at 5:16 pm | Reply
  8. bbtonly

    metroooooooo all the way!!!!!!

    April 16, 2010 at 5:16 pm | Reply
  9. CMHenshaw7

    We already teach "Males Studies" in every classroom in the nation, although it's usually called "History".

    April 16, 2010 at 5:19 pm | Reply
  10. Sofia

    Why does the traditional sense of manliness seem to mirror that of a barbarian. I can't stand the stubble, scruff, sloppyness, and macho that it seems is being defined as 'manliness'. I much prefer to have a more sensative, thus more well rounded man. One who knows about culture; who cleans his nails, and dresses nicely. How is being clean and cultured "feminizing"? Men can be this and still be able to protect me. And why would women want some sloppy, scrungy dude – major turn-off – not interested.

    Now Men's Studies....that sounds pretty.... feminine...but if it teaches men to have integrity, be honest, cultured, clean and respectful of women, I'm all for it.

    April 16, 2010 at 5:21 pm | Reply
  11. Evie

    I am a woman in the military, and honestly, *most* (though certainly not all) of the guys in this line of work tend to drift towards the more masculine look an demeanor. I remain unimpressed by the men that prance around in skintight clothes and are plucked and moisturized to within an inch of their lives. Go natural guys, if I wanted soft skin, a light touch and vanity, I'd be a lesbian. Take a lesson from your military bretheren and just be a guy, (but please, do keep the cologne)

    April 16, 2010 at 5:37 pm | Reply
  12. ka1409

    Can´t wait for the lab work on the Male Studies courses.

    April 16, 2010 at 5:55 pm | Reply
  13. Ruth E.

    I absolutely think that it would be beneficial to the younger masculine culture currently existing in especially Europe and the United States to shift from the metrosexual to the more conservative machissmo attitude and look.

    April 16, 2010 at 5:56 pm | Reply
  14. Lorenzo A. Casimiro Duran

    Neither of the two aproaches is for me. A real man, is he who, considers the teachings and follows in his own lifestyle the testimony and doctrine of Our Lord Jesuschrist. That is to be a man! Greetings from Mexico City!

    April 16, 2010 at 6:04 pm | Reply
  15. Eddie

    I think it's shameful that we try to impose certain things on people so far as how they should act or how they should dress, etc. If someone has a natural inclination toward a certain kind of activity, like being a rugged, sandpaper faced, broad chested, tool-box-having man, then they should be not only allowed, but encouraged to do so.

    And, as a man, I'd like women reading this article to ponder only this; Think of every guy you were ever attracted to. Was he like a woman when you first became attracted to him, which is what the metrosexual movement is all about? Or was he a Man, with a capital M?

    April 16, 2010 at 6:18 pm | Reply
  16. Loren K. Mosley

    Yes, I think a man should be able to be one. Like the old Clark Gable movies. Every commercial you see have a man looking like a punk, just taking order from his wife. It should be a meeting of the mind and not just so one way. I like being a man...

    April 16, 2010 at 6:18 pm | Reply
  17. Alica

    I applaud this effort and its time to let men look like me, act like men. of course with respect and honor.

    April 16, 2010 at 6:19 pm | Reply
  18. writerdood

    Course may include, but is not limited to the following:
    – Hunting, for a good restaurant.
    – Beer, because it tastes good.
    – How to determine which girls are out of your league.
    – How to determine which girls are in your league.
    – How to get in a better league.
    – Lies you should always tell.
    – How to talk smack.
    – When to quit talking smack.
    – When to walk away, and when to take a swing.
    – How to appear wealthy.
    – How to get wealthy (legally).
    – How to get wealthy (illegally).
    – How to survive prison.
    – How to resist pain.

    April 16, 2010 at 6:25 pm | Reply
  19. Adam

    I think it something to do with how teenage girls drive music sales and such. I remember when I was a teenager the girls in my age group liked the skinny feminine looking guys, but as I got older I found that the girls were going for the more masculiine types.

    I think it's an age thing and media engineered thing.

    April 16, 2010 at 6:30 pm | Reply
  20. Quique

    Im a contruction worker in Florida,....i never loss the man ....im still a man now,..and i will be a man in the future,...i feel like the dinasaurus, almost extinct,...but not yet,...there are many of us out there.....

    April 16, 2010 at 6:33 pm | Reply
  21. Eliot

    I think part of this is also due to the technological boom... before men used to do more laborious tasks and travel and used to lead a rough life... now a days most men sit in the office, crunch numbers and sip coffee... no different than a house wife doing house chores... its not only the looks but also the attitude that is becoming more feminine like...

    April 16, 2010 at 7:49 pm | Reply
  22. gwh0262

    Stereotypes that are perpetuated are a problem for us all. Everything and everyone evolves – our thoughts, our personaes, personalties, beliefs... society in general. Change or perish.

    I guess the root of all of this is "We are who we are". But that isn't who we will be. Why not just accept everyone as is. It would be a lot easier and most everyone would be a lot happier.

    April 16, 2010 at 7:59 pm | Reply
  23. Apuuli

    As a gay man, I would love to see manliness return, for two reasons:

    1. I like masculine men, not these primped up gurly men. I like men so why would i want my men to act like women?

    2. With all these metro sexual straight men around, it is hard to figure out who I should (or should not) be hitting on!

    April 16, 2010 at 8:32 pm | Reply
  24. Kamran

    What a man has really lost in this society is the ability to be HIMSELF. Everybody thinks they have to follow this rule or that rule. Groom yourself as you like, not what you think others like, wear what makes you comfortable and expresses your personality. All of this within the bounds of moderation, decency and respect. All other considerations be damned.

    April 16, 2010 at 8:44 pm | Reply
  25. George Baxter

    After 35 years teaching and administrating in secondary schools in the Caribbean, I have seen evidence, since the 80's, of this so-called feminization. I have never done a study but wondered about the causal effects of the increase of single parenting (usually a female parent) of young men on this phenomenon. Certainly many young men exhibit the metrosexual trait. A return to the encouragement of manliness, sensible machismo and manly honor should have a beneficial effect on the raising of young men.

    April 16, 2010 at 8:46 pm | Reply
  26. ViTG

    I disagree with most people...the men and boys I see aren't feminine at all, I am still put off daily by bravado and 'manliness' in fact

    I like the George Clooney, Wayne Shorter and Chiwetel Ejiofor type of men: Gentle(men), artistic and soft-spoken and groomed

    I am absolutely fabled with this whole "Too feminine" attitude people have or see, because I don't see it.....do they also say the same about girls being tomboy-ish?

    It hasnt even been a century of proper emancipation and these ' Manly' men are already whining, whether its on CNN, in the class, fora etcetc.....what about those few millenia where women could shut up?

    April 16, 2010 at 9:04 pm | Reply
  27. Trevor

    I think there is a not exactly serious problem, but certainly a disturbing problem in this country. I have never in my life seen so many men who want to look like woman, and i'm not talking homosexuals. All you see on TV these days are lads who would sob in a corner if they ever had a callus. The problem with this is most woman today seem to actually like it. I am a commercial diver working for the navy, you will not find a pretty boy doing my job. I am 6'4" 240 lbs, don't shave regularly and only drink beer. And not just any beer, it has to be soooo damn dark light will not pass through. Boys today need to stop reading cosmo, stop gelling their hair and for the love of god stop wearing skin tight pants. That is at least a start. One more thing, when did men become afraid of hair, not on their heads, they have found.............Stylists. I mean hair on the rest of their bodies, If I could grow my back hair out long enough to braid, you can bet you a$$ I would. Its time to be men lads, grow a beard, kill an animal with your bare hands and eat it raw. See a woman you like, beat the crap out of the pansy standing next to her, I sure she will appreciate that. These are words to live by.

    April 16, 2010 at 9:06 pm | Reply
  28. George

    When did Manliness ever go away? There have been various styles, fashions, etc., but the basic core values of Manliness have never vanished. They're just not adhered to by a particular grouping of media-sensitive boys who embrace an effeminate culture. Go outside the urban centers and you have vast swathes of men who, by all accounts, embody manliness. The blue collar farmers, the small town mechanics, etc. Peek into Military life and you'll find a virtual breeding ground for old fashion qualities... honor, duty, respect, integrity, etc. Anyone that's been through boot camp/BCT knows that the Drill Sergeants become virtual father figures, teaching young guys the basics of manliness, from how to shave to cleaning and self-reliance and hard work. I think that women have always been attracted to, and appreciate, the classic or "retro" manliness (which goes to show why every woman I know gushes over the show Madmen). There is the common misdiagnoses that women want a "bad boy" kinda guy, when in fact women are attracted to the confidence, not the bad boy image per se. That "retro" style of manliness is all about the confidence of being a man. That comes with earning your pay, working for what you want, embracing getting dirt under your fingernails, the ability to show you stand on your own two feet no matter what, and that you are both a provider and guardian for a woman and family. None of these qualities mean that a man cannot also be sensitive and caring... they just don't have to wear their hearts on their sleeves or express through fashion that they're "in tune" with women.

    April 16, 2010 at 9:26 pm | Reply
  29. DaLe

    In a few general words, growing up:
    for males = boy blabla –> Sir Lala
    for females = lady gaga –> Lady Awe

    An important role is the "mating ritual". It seems that many people tend to look at the "standard" of what is considered an acceptable mating partner. Partially because of which many have adapted styles of sub-cultures. Eg. here in the UK I noticed a few times that the males waiting in line for admission to a club were all practically looking the same.
    I think that both genders need to help each other, so to speak. Eg. if barely any female expects poetry, or anything in those lines, then it is not very likely that males would make an effort to improve their way of expressing themselves by grunts and statements like "You are as awesome as Battlestar Galactica".

    April 16, 2010 at 9:29 pm | Reply
  30. Windy

    Neither. I don't know why we have to discuss it in extremes at all. I don't want some scrungy, stinky, unhygienic beast, and I don't want a girl. I appreciate effort. If I am putting on my best, I think the guy should, too. He doesn't have to have a manicure, or a shaved chest, and I am not asking for a ton of accessories and more prep time on the hair than I put in. You don't need a suit, but don't just throw on a t-shirt if we're going for dinner and a movie; save that for fun-in-the-sun when we're both dressed down.

    Middle ground is nice. Has anyone heard of it?

    Also, you might want to consider another term for promoting the more masculine aesthetic. 'Machismo' for me means not being able to walk from my car to the door of a convenience store without an unwanted and aggressive proposition a la "Hey, baby, how 'bout we [insert vulgar come-on here]! Yeah, you know you want it."

    Masculinity can be dead sexy when it's paired with temperance. Over-the-top aggression just makes me want to carry a weapon during broad daylight. It's not pleasant or sexy.

    April 16, 2010 at 9:35 pm | Reply
  31. Phil

    Im a manly man and long may I be so. Time for men to be men again. Instead of these wussy sarong wearing limp wrists. Our basic instinct is to be hunter gatherers. Eat red meat and sport hairy chests. None of this primped eyebrow plucking metrosexuality. Manliness all the way

    April 16, 2010 at 9:47 pm | Reply
  32. michael Libasci

    While I too have witnessed the femization of younger men, I have also witnessed the masculization of women. Women today wear pants, tee shirts, baseball caps and sneakers and if they do wear a dress you sometimes see their ankle tattoo.

    If your looking for an understanding of manliness simply pick up a Hemmingway novel or read Gibbon's Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire where he explanes "Manly Virtue".

    April 16, 2010 at 10:14 pm | Reply
  33. Molly

    I love a manly man....wouldn't have mine any other way. I have girlfriends, however, who like a "softer side" to their boys. I don't get it, but to each her own.

    April 16, 2010 at 10:18 pm | Reply
  34. Sara

    I have gone through the culture shock of moving to Australia where life in the corporate world is still in the 50s. To all the ladies in US who enjoy a work life of not being conscious of their gender, you don't want the manly man, especially in the corporate world.

    April 16, 2010 at 10:35 pm | Reply
  35. Ben

    Way to go!!! Bring back the manhood!!

    April 16, 2010 at 10:39 pm | Reply
  36. Amazed

    So, VITG, you like to compare life today with the past millennia. Do you forget the 'Hanging for stealing sheep or bread, or being persecuted because of your religion'
    You only want to think in terms of women's pain. How about you and the rest of your sex enjoy the advances that we have achieved and stop trying to persecute the male sex for all the stuff that went on before they were even born,
    I personally agree with most of the sentiments expressed above. Men are and should be, men, but I do think manners and respect would help. Is it too much to expect chivalry and honour? Depends on who you are dealing with.

    April 16, 2010 at 10:39 pm | Reply
  37. Double Standards

    I see a lot of double standards with respect to how each gender is allowed to express what qualities they desire in a mate. There are comments posted here that express a desire to see men who are not only preened from 'head to toe', wear nice (usually expensive clothes) and be well read and cultured, but at the same time be 'manly' having the ability to be the protector and provider. This has been termed by most as being a well rounded man. Unfortunately when a man describes a well rounded women he gets ripped a new one for be a misogynistic bastard. Think about it? The well rounded male was described as having certain 'old world' characteristics (protector and provider) with a mix of 'new world' characteristics (clean, cultured etc). Now lets describe a female with a mix of old and new world characteristics. Old world would entail emotional and physical qualities that would translate to being a good mother (believe it or not this is actually a biological response in males when looking for a mate) showing domestic qualities (although nowadays these tasks should be shared). Additional qualities that are now desired from women are a shared responsibility with finances, they maintain physical attractiveness and the expectation they would have a wide range of interests to hold conversations because next time someone tries to engage me in a conversation about America's Next Top Model i will shot myself. Most of the qualities described above is that they are actually in opposition to each other. In the case of women the contemporary image of beauty and attractiveness does not lend itself well to being child bearer (Victoria Beckham just found that out). Also if they are expected to shoulder a fair share of financial responsibility there is less opportunity for them to maintain this modern idea of 'sexy'. Same goes for males. If you want a male to be a protector then someone skinny enough to fit tight jeans will probably not fill that mould. If you want a milk the poor bastard under the guise of him being the provider then they will probably not have much money remaining to buy themselves manicures, body lotions and nice clothes after he has paid for dinner/movie/show tickets/petrol/your jewelery/your part of the holiday/mortgage! AND if you want him to be able to buy both, then expect him to have to work longer hours on top of going to the gym to be fit and strong enough to be protector therefore no bitching when he is never around to talk to you about feelings. Sooooooo what point am i trying to make with this comment/rant? The point I am trying to make is that BOTH genders have been bombarded in recent times with this idea that not only should they maintain their traditional roles but now they should take on new roles that often contradict each other. I believe advertising has a lot to do with this. An example for males is the GQ magazine. This magazine shows pictures of guys made up from head to toe in expensive clothes, wearing expensive watches, using expensive fragrance, standing next to a $500,000 sports car. To add insult to injury they usually throw in a ridiculously attractive girl next to him as to say hahahahaha because you such a broke fool and cant afford any of this stuff a girl like this will never be obtainable. And lets face it the volume of media available to women to make them feel sh*t about themselves is unlimited.

    April 16, 2010 at 10:58 pm | Reply
  38. Saiki

    I think we need both manly men and metrosexuals. There are women out there who are attracted to both. Probably the best thing is in between the two. I personally like a man who can take care of themself, who can cook, who likes art, can talk about his feelings, but at the same time is athletic, confident and self-reliant. I don't think you HAVE to have one or the other.

    April 16, 2010 at 11:02 pm | Reply
  39. Phil in Asia

    Manliness has ever died!!

    Metrosexual, as others have written, is just another commercial ploy to sell products to modern day men that are more sensitive or in some cases otherwise inclined.

    My meaning is this....as society has changed over the years, people have gained more wealth, become less mobile (not hunter gathers any more), and therefore have had more time to be influenced by different opportunties that were previously unavailiable to the common man.

    Anyone that doesn't believe that Royalty hrough the years didn't take care of themselves in a very metrosexualesque was, is fooling themselves. They had the finest clothes, the best perfumes (and they were perfumes back then, not cologne), the best milks and creams for thier skin, etc.

    Back then real men (the common man) worked with their hands day in and day out (minus the sabith) either as serfs, or peasants, lower cast people, merchants, blacksmiths, etc.

    In Modern Day times, these real men continue to exist along with several other classes of "real men" that previously did not: we have corporate bankers, foremen, professional athletes, stay at home dads, etc. The difference is these new classes of men actually take care of themselves. They can afford to, they choose to, and they see the beenfits of using these in appropriately labeled metrosexual products.

    So as I started to say in the beginning. Real Men (aka "manliness) never died!! The difference is that we now have an option to take care of ourselves too!!

    April 16, 2010 at 11:15 pm | Reply
  40. ViTG

    Hi Amazed

    I was actually born with XY genes and a peepee so I am not sure how you can call me a woman....I guess I am giving you a wrong impression

    I am however transgendered (I hear people thinking " Oh, no, not this again *sigh*) in that I feel both, I behave and have traits of both I guess

    People are almost zealous in their beliefs how gender should be and the posters here show it, and so do I: I dont like very masculine guys or very feminine women too much, but I generally seem to get along with women a little better, in everyday life as well as intimate

    It's only my opinion and I would gladly leave this planet so you don't have to put up with the defects in your beloved Hunter-Gatherer culture you cherish, if you would allow mine

    April 17, 2010 at 12:03 am | Reply
  41. Elian

    At this time on planet earth, to be preoccupied by gender expression is
    to fiddle while Rome is burning. Humanity is at stake....
    Women are not going back to the stoves and bedrooms, no matter
    what, so adjustments need to be made, on both sides of the
    hormonal fence....keeps us on our toes, a good thing! ....

    April 17, 2010 at 12:07 am | Reply
  42. Anna

    Well put, Sheiligh! Well put!

    I, too, was a feminist in the early 70's. Not only were/are feminist wrong, but have failed in the root foundations of feminism. Freedom, acceptance & equality for all. Since the 70's men have been systematically neutered, personally, emotionally & socially.

    The distorted feminism of our generation has created men who are less relationally responsible than the men formerly railed about. Young women are more sexually oppressed than any other generation (There was a notion that women who married & stayed home were whores, trading security for sex. Today women give sex for nothing – no name, no sexual satisfaction, committment of relationship, or security. A status worse than our predecessors).

    Two decades of unequal educational energies, focused solely on women, have left our young men in an social, emotional & productive vacuum. Males are damned if they do & damned if they don't – regardless of their efforts. Positive contributions are minimized & devalued by self-centered & self-destructive amazons.

    To conclude this profoundly restrained, "politically incorrect" rant ... bring on the manly men who fart & smell, but open doors & assist women in need. Men who haven't been so emasculated as to know they are sorely needed by our culture & come forward. Men who may bumble the superfiscial 'finesses' of a Now Culture, but are true to their maleness, mates & themselves.

    Where have you gone Joe DiMadgio, a nation turns it's lonely eyes to you.

    Anna

    April 17, 2010 at 12:43 am | Reply
  43. John Dinwiddie

    Good grief.

    This is where it is, or is not, in the long haul. Look at the father
    images in the daily comics.

    Ted, in Sally Forth, gets castrated by his wife or daughter every
    other day.

    The mother in Zits could run Hell, and her husband looks like
    that sad man in an apron in Rebel Without a Cause.

    Dagwood and Homer, well, there they are.

    And for single men, we get the jerk in Garfield.

    Manliness itself is a moribund term. What other than lifting weights
    distributes virtue with genes? So at least that confusion is good,
    if backlash is inevitable. Watch the sources of the backlash, however.
    Promise keepers and other patriarchal religious nuts do work
    on their pecs, hoping to rise again.

    But what has to rise at all in a healthy society is a long haul reflection
    of males as something else than the eunichs listed in my first
    paragraph. Rex Morgan is not the answer. Just ordinary people
    whose dignity and every day workaday bravery gets press, not
    the treatment delivered by two hack cartoonists to poor Ted in
    Sally Forth.

    April 17, 2010 at 1:17 am | Reply
  44. OutofAmerica

    You need to understand that this is "maleness" spoken of in the Western societies. In many countries and cultures, machismo is still king. In Asian cultures, many women still traditionally defer to men, the same is true in many Latin American cultures. In some places the places of men and women are extremely distorted by culture or religion, as here in the Middle East where I currently work. As I have traveled the globe the last 15 years, the interaction and roles that men and women play withing their respective cultures have always been interesting. But I do think that the feminization of men in the Western culture has run its course. We are not the same. We are different. We should embrace that difference as something special while accepting and embracing the difference the other gender offers us.

    April 17, 2010 at 1:39 am | Reply
  45. Dave

    Today's society is so lost and clueless.
    What people do for the sake of what they call style is horrendous.
    Nothing wrong with a guy taking some pride in his appearance. The main thing is that some guys need to know what looks good on them and what doesnt.
    Women's jeans on a guy could never be fashion, despite what the 'misunderstood' crowd want you to believe. Seems the 'in thing' is to be bi sexual these days anyway, so it's pretty clear where these influences come from.
    Bottom line is, know what works for you. Dont follow because you want to be someone else, be yourself.

    April 17, 2010 at 1:44 am | Reply
  46. belinda

    women need a man that is strong but not afraid to show affection

    April 17, 2010 at 1:52 am | Reply
  47. RM

    As long as he bathes and shaves regularly and doesn't fart loudly while in line at the supermarket I am good with machismo...... Those 'girly men' just irritate me.

    April 17, 2010 at 1:53 am | Reply
  48. Bob

    I thought a metrosexual was some somebody who did it on the subway...

    April 17, 2010 at 1:56 am | Reply
  49. Jkh

    Manliness = old, fat, beer-filled, balding, sweating, farting, ugly, redneck, bigot

    Metro = young, athletic, educated, cultured, attractive, healthy

    April 17, 2010 at 1:59 am | Reply
  50. Ngosia

    I live in Africa in Kenya to be specific. Here men are as manly they can be, we drink beer, take care of our women etc but here, the media has had a big role when it comes to feminization. Soap operas (south american). Anyone who has been here will agree with me that they creat a certain expectation in women and little boys and girls in single parenthood that are made to watch them. We rarely have manly TV programes. Metrosexuals down here are poor men conditioned to act like that in order to bag rich women or spoilt rich brats. Here, society is realy concerned to see that one stays a man but many men should be encouraged to be there for their baby boys rather than letting TV do the teaching for we have seen what the west is going through. All in real men stand up and take charge and women should be more understanding for times have changed for them to want a provider and a sensitive ever present man. Lets be accomodative to real proggressive men.

    April 17, 2010 at 2:23 am | Reply
  51. deepwater805

    Finally! A chance to show our true macho colors! In fact, the next time I take the girlfriend out, we're gonna go down the local truckstop disco, start doing Jack shooters, and get in a fight. Naturally I'll hold her purse till she's finished beating the pi$$ outta somebody....

    April 17, 2010 at 2:52 am | Reply
  52. n

    I want a man that is all man!!!! He should initiate in a relationship. Provide for his family. He should know how to and protect me, he should be able to fix things and make me feel safe. He should not be afraid to get dirty and smelly to get the job done. I don't care if he used hair or skin products or his nails are clean! I want a manly man!

    April 17, 2010 at 2:53 am | Reply
  53. 3 ID

    JKH you sound like a girl, you must be. Manliness is rugged, physically and mentally strong, independent, intelligent, decisive, persistent.

    April 17, 2010 at 3:03 am | Reply
  54. Andybrew

    Although a drive to more "manliness" amongst the youth is a good idea, as so many young men find themselves growing up without astrong male role model, I feel that a revolution is not on the way yet! One need only look at the metrosexual role models in today's media, and the fashion that is coming out of places like Japan and Korea to see that the Trend is still on the up. Give it a few more years, and then we'll see.

    April 17, 2010 at 3:53 am | Reply
  55. Richard

    Why all of a sudden it is feminine to want to take care of the quality of your skin? That in addition to wearing clean clothes? Tight shirts and jeans are actually from the 70s and early 80s, don't mix up fashion trends and times.
    Metrosexuals and gay men have been more openly supportive of taking traditional women's role as grocery shopping and home cores. I just think this is civilized 21st century humanity, and by no means I would agree looking rugged is not metrosexual as well.
    In any case, the writer of this article successfully made us comment about this, but probably only the marginal conservative group of usual Republicans want to go back to caveman and cavewoman roles in society.

    April 17, 2010 at 4:03 am | Reply
  56. SwissPaul

    Take thousand of young men to Afghanistan or Iraq, put them in miserable living conditions, desensitize them with an hostile environment.
    Make the videos available on the 'net for other young men to watch, and add a nice cocktail of kombat videogames, high school bullyism....
    I definitely thin that "metrosexuality" is out, and can hear the barbarous hordes at the gates.
    Except maybe in the enclaves reserved to the super wealthy, that is.

    April 17, 2010 at 4:53 am | Reply
  57. felix sabiniano

    i go for the old manliness.........i agree that metrosexual makes them girly. dont dress the men like dolls. leave them alone to their own for inside them they are beautiful without these flashy things like beckham or other celebries promoting. love men for their simplicity not the rubbish clothes not everyone can afford or not every one can wear everyday.

    April 17, 2010 at 5:18 am | Reply
  58. Enrico

    wearing a sarong doesn't make you less of a man just like wearing a kilt doesn't make you less of a man. Roman men conquered the world in real hand to hand battles wearing what we in todays world call 'skirts'...but in today's world we percieve anyone wearing something that looks like a skirt less of a man. It's not what you wear that makes you man....

    April 17, 2010 at 5:23 am | Reply
  59. A Davis

    Some of the previous posts refer to historical ideals of manly men. They are distortions, of course, relying as they do on the old idea that in older times men were more manly and woman more feminine. The founding fathers of the US referred to in an earlier post wore powdered wigs, make up, frilly shirts, and were francophiles. In Jesus' time, regular bathing and grooming was a must, as it was for the Greeks and the Romans, who would have looked upon the more "manly" European bararians as animals. Shaving was also important for the Greeks and Romans. A "manly" man for Greeks and Romans might even take a male lover who as the passive partner was viewed as unmanly while the aggressor was considered all male. In short, beyond the social construct (and any individual insecurities aside), manliness may be defined by appearance or behavior in the eye of the beholder, but it's simply a matter of a Y chromozone.

    April 17, 2010 at 5:51 am | Reply
  60. H

    It's about time! The men of our generation have definitely lost their manliness. But, there needs to be a balance. I'm tired of guys that take longer to get ready in the morning than I do, but I still want a guy who knows how to take care of himself. You can be a real man and still be sensitive. Being manly doesn't have to equal the gross stereotypes such as mentioned by Jkh. You can be manly and still "young, athletic, educated, cultured, attractive, and healthy." I think the important thing is being confident in who you really are, and not letting culture, or fads, dictate who you let others think you are. Nothing is more attractive than a man who is so confident in who he is that he's not constantly worrying about what kind of image he is portraying, and is just free to be himself, whoever that may be.

    April 17, 2010 at 6:32 am | Reply
  61. Eddie

    It's about time!

    April 17, 2010 at 6:49 am | Reply
  62. Marlette

    Well, it's about time!

    April 17, 2010 at 6:56 am | Reply
  63. G

    To M: puleeeez, be more manly like our founding fathers? Really, they wore silk legging stockings, powdered faces and frilly wigs

    April 17, 2010 at 7:29 am | Reply
  64. G

    RM: this isnt about you, no one cares what you think, so shut up

    April 17, 2010 at 7:32 am | Reply
  65. G

    belinda, this is not about what women want

    April 17, 2010 at 7:33 am | Reply
  66. Katherine

    Oh, please. They were the first to have equal rights. What more do they want? And God forbids there be men out there, hordes of them even, that are like Hemingway– chauvinistic and domineering.

    April 17, 2010 at 7:51 am | Reply
  67. Kynt

    @ Bill: Men already dictated for centuries how women should be, whether women let them or not. A lot of what woman are today that is not in accordance with the dictate they only achieved through fight, protest and rebellion.

    April 17, 2010 at 8:07 am | Reply
  68. Isa

    Give a serious look at old movies. The actors look great because they have make-up on. They act the way "real men" do, yes, but is that what our world needs most?

    April 17, 2010 at 8:07 am | Reply
  69. Emanuel ben Avraham

    Thank g-d! It's about time society woke up and realized the male gender has been so irrevocably confused and ostracized by the opposite sex as to what our role is now a-days and how to behave around them that we are emotionally lost and have no clear identity.
    The continuous emotional tug-of-war to which the male gender has been subjected by its opposite number, has the modern male ragged in the wind as to what is an appropriate behavior towards the women in our life. Should we be sensitive and romantic? Should we be the Alfa-male? One and the other, one or the other?
    Rampant feminism, independently of all its achievements in women's rights, has completely screwed the gender roles in our society.

    April 17, 2010 at 8:41 am | Reply
  70. Maz

    I like how Sheligh says "in Islamic circles" women are still raped and stoned? I wonder if your head is in the sand or you just watch Fox news? Do you know how many women were raped in the U.S alone last year, more than most Islamic countries put together??? Please wake up? Better read, read a newspaper or a book or two, you just might learn something. And in terms of Manliness, its about damn time. All of this metro, retro, nonesense needs to go the way of the vcr. Men need to be men and women need to be women. Its pretty easy...

    April 17, 2010 at 8:42 am | Reply
  71. Moya

    Metrosexual, I suppose, because they are more intellectual. 'Manly' men are often traditional, which means they want women to be traditional (make me dinner, woman!) and I'm not a traditional woman. So a thinking man, thank you very much.

    April 17, 2010 at 8:46 am | Reply
  72. rainy

    I believe that its the guys own choice of what to accept and what not to accept. Personally, guys that are too manly kinda put me off...

    April 17, 2010 at 8:50 am | Reply
  73. Ophir Flomenbom

    Yes, there is a problem that has beed developed
    in the last 3 decades; everyone can see it.

    But we need to balance the bad influence
    of those that not just don't care, but, in fact, benefit
    from this 'metro-men-hood movement'.
    This balance is possible!

    Actually,
    the only changes that happened in the last 30 years
    are with the technology, and not with our GENES!

    April 17, 2010 at 10:14 am | Reply
  74. Thomas

    Yes, a male studies curriculum is sorely needed in US academia! Not because men don't know how to dress (metro or macho) but rather because anti-male hatred (did you watch TV lately?) and discrimination (why is Tiger Wood's wife not in jail for domestic violence?) have become so prevalent today.

    Did you know that 85% of suicides are men? And that this is a 300% increase since the 60's? Did you know that this increase is attributed to men losing their children, their house, their savings and their future income in divorces? Do you think this is fair to them?

    Did you know that 95% of workplace deaths are men? (we're too busy talking about the "wage gap" – which is a feminist invention according to both US and UK government studies – to notice the "death gap")

    Did you know that the overwhelmingly majority of homeless are men? (If it were women you better believe that something would have been done about it a long time ago!)

    Did you know that the overwhelming majority of people freed by the Innocence Project are men accused of sex crimes? What does it tell you about due process in sex crimes investigations? (remember Duke?)

    Did you know that 50% of domestic violence victims are men? Did you know that 30% of hospital visits related to DV are from men? Did you know that police is trained to arrest men in most cases of DV regardless of the situation (predominant aggressor doctrine)?

    Did you know that a married man today has no rights to his house (he can be kicked out from his home overnight if his wife "feels threatened" and gets a restraining order), to his kids (even though the majority of men and women support shared parenting, feminist lobbying groups have successfully blocked it until now), to his savings, and to his future income (try googling "child support calculator ", fill-in your numbers, add your taxes (paid at the single childless rate, no deduction for child support paid) and see if you can survive on what's left of your income – good luck!)

    Did you know that the family courts are financed based on the amount of child support collected? Can you see the conflict of interest here? Is it really in the best interest of the child to separate children from their fathers, let them spend as little time as possible with the father, and bankrupt the father with impossible child support payments? Or is it in the best interest of the family court system?

    Did you know that many fathers who lost their jobs did not get a child support modification? Do you know that according to a government study of "dead-beat" dads, the two major reasons for failure to pay CS are: child support was higher than the man's earnings and child support was not modified when the man lost his job? Did you know that men who fail to pay CS lose their driver license and are incarcerated (sometimes doing forced labor with earnings confiscated), while their CS keeps growing. Did you know that past CS due can never be dismissed by any judge (including bankruptcy judge), regardless of your personal situation (there are stories of prisoners of war who did not get a CS adjustment for the years their were held hostage, or guys in coma for several years etc...)

    This is why we need a male's studies program: This information HAS TO GET OUT into mainstream media! And for that, we need proper academic background.

    April 17, 2010 at 2:37 pm | Reply
  75. Sean

    There are plenty of men who still sail oceans, climb mountains, work on oil rigs, fight wars and take part in myriad 'manly' tasks every day. They just don't play well on TV and, for the most part, don't give a darn for the publicity. The only place the 'metrosexual' dominates the male landscape is, frankly, in the metros, the magazines and television. Don't worry, there are plenty of smart, strong, manly men out there living life all over the world.

    April 17, 2010 at 5:48 pm | Reply
  76. Finally

    Honestly about time. Men have been scorned and persecuted for so long

    April 17, 2010 at 10:58 pm | Reply
  77. Porky Domesticus

    Macho or metrosexual, either way you're just doing what your'e told. Both these models need to be ditched, plain and simple.

    April 18, 2010 at 2:02 am | Reply
  78. Gilbert

    I think our society needs to redefine masculinity. It has nothing to do with what sex you prefer or what clothes you wear. Masculinity has to do with the heart and the mind. How you treat others and yourself. To be a man is to take care of your family and to be a strong person for whom others can rely on.

    April 18, 2010 at 2:20 am | Reply
  79. esmith512

    The "metrosexual" term always struck me as a strange term invented by part of our culture that couldn't quite understand men taking better care of themselves and their health than the ambient cultural schema affords to most men. The *term* "menaissance" is equally strange for the same reasons, but I welcome the *idea* of "menaissance" if it means that men are no longer cursed and relentlessly demonized or insulted de facto second-class citizens, or a forced into a lower status of poorer maintenance, greater legal hazard with lesser and fewer legal rights and representation, higher and earlier-in-life mortality, relative underrepresentation and institutional ostracization and a generally lower social caste of higher violence, oppression, and lower civil and social rights and far fewer social, educational, and civil privileges.
    As far as "manliness" somehow "coming back", I'd prefer "manliness" to mean being a fully fledged human being who happens to be male. I find offense in the traditional meaning of "manliness" being a loutish and violent arrogant jerk who is deluded into thinking neglecting their life and safety and being an exploited fool for the benefit of others as honorable and a point of proud self-definition (a'la John Wayne's various movie roles–the real John Wayne was actually a student of the arts and a joyful participant in theater.)

    April 18, 2010 at 6:47 am | Reply
  80. The Geezer

    The world needs more Lee Marvin types. That's the way men are supposed to be, not the girlie wishy washy wimp types that we see on TV everyday.

    April 18, 2010 at 10:46 am | Reply
  81. jessye

    I would like to transform oneself metrosexual !
    Great!

    April 19, 2010 at 2:11 am | Reply
  82. Theo

    I'm always struck by how television and radio commercials always show the smart person, the good decision maker, the calm person, to be a woman. While the counterpart that becomes the butt of the joke is a male. This must be because business marketing majors are predominantly women.

    April 19, 2010 at 7:37 pm | Reply
  83. Dave J

    I have always wondered what would happen in the event of a national catastrophe. What would all those effeminate office guys do? I am a professional electrician, gun owning, lawn mowing, truck driving, bring out the garbage and always hold doors for women kind of guy. I think this would put me at the top of the food chain! I find so many men today cant even start a lawn mower or change a light bulb.

    April 20, 2010 at 10:35 pm | Reply
  84. jimbo

    I hope this will mean hairy chests are coming back. The feminization of men has gone too far.

    April 24, 2010 at 9:36 am | Reply

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